You know when i said my child hood was ass. Well trying to be himalayan beautiful and gifted in a fucking catholic school. First and i will admit i acted strange for my early teens and teen years. That was because i did not know about how to cope with ptsd and the other was that i was so gifted i was an odd duck. The kids snd teachers hated me for it. The fucking 9/11 happened and it was not a good time to be brown and the bullying got a hell of alot worse. People called me ethnic names as well as the r word. Things got worse right after the year of 9/11 when i though i wanted to be an fbi agent and tried to be recruited in to the agency. The principle saw me as a “clear and present danger” called my mom and told her that was on the next plane to guantanamo bay if my behaviour did not improve. Before you say really or yeah right.... just ask my parents who had the fucking call. Boy i got a new bellybutton when i got home and tae keon do lessons to help “straighten up”. This was when my life started going up and down. After a few monthes of tkd i was a skilled artist and commended respect in high school. I had no friends until grade ten up no one dared to bully me. I then realized that my tae kwon do teach had me in the yakuza. With that i removed myself from the martial arts world and connvert to buddhism in 2006 when my big mouth father told me i was uyger and tibetan on my moms side. My mom said the same thing. Soon i got and still interested in ugyer and tibetan and himalayan culture as well as mountaineering. 2006 was also they diagnoised me with CPTSD because repeated trauma that spended from birth to the age of 15. It took me years to figure out how to cope with and eith out buddhism. Thats when i discovered the baoding balls in 2009- a worker gave them to me and i knew what to fo from there. Since then my anger and resentment decreased. I collect baoding ball since abd my eye brows have grown back. The baoding balls where invented in ming dynasty china to help cure ptsd and other meldies. The best fucking invention- the baoding balls Secon best- the book Third -internet.