The graveyard is the richest place on earth, because it is here that you will find all the hopes and dreams that were never fulfilled, the books that were never written, the songs that were never sung, the inventions that were never shared, the cures that were never discovered, all because someone was too afraid to take that first step, keep with the problem, or determined to carry out their dream." Les Brown Now that I have shifted my focus from competitive bodybuilding to writing, the atmosphere of my mind has taken on an astounding clarity and expansiveness. ("I can see clearly now the rain is gone" just lullabied it's way through my head). I have become more aware of my emotions and the thought patterns they invoke. In doing so, ideas and inspirations for writing are continuously flowing through my psyche. I often feel as if I'm in "La La Land" and with each blink of my eyes a new path or journey appears… There are masterpieces everywhere! And I am awake and aware of it all. It's like I have stepped out of a shadow and sunlight continuously pours over me! Author: 13 years old - 1st competitionI love bodybuilding though - understand that! I lift heavy and have an insatiable penchant for pushing my limits. I fell in love with bodybuilding when I was thirteen. Actually, I became a fitness fanatic when I was ten while aerobics was making its world debut. It has served me well both physically and mentally. Had it not been for my intense focus in that arena we would not be having this conversation now! Bodybuilding, running, and cross training have kept me from plunging deep into the Dregs of Depression ,drug addiction, and alcoholism. Weight training and wanting to become a personal trainer kept me focused and alive. However, bodybuilding is not my thing. I am a writer. I started writing before I started working out and then abruptly shifted my focus to bodybuilding. When I did that, the writer stepped into the shadow of the bodybuilder. In 2018, the desire to begin my autobiography emerged again as it had done sporadically since 2006. However, my life took a few major twists and turns, as usual, and my autobiography slid to the side and "A Love Story: The Truth About Faith" was created. It took me a year to write and during that year an amazing transformation took place: my true self emerged from within the shadow. Seeing my book available on Amazon and having a young woman who is very dear to my heart tell me that it was what she needed at that precise time in her life birthed me into the fullness of my purpose as a literary artist. About two and a half months after publishing my book, I had a conversation with God. where He explained to me that he had allowed and encouraged me to focus on bodybuilding to keep me moving forward. He said this is my truth: I am not a bodybuilder who writes… I am a writer who participates in bodybuilding. You know how in the movies when someone has an epiphany and the clouds separate and angelic voices sing "ahhhhhh"? Well, that was that moment. It became crystal clear to me that I had misidentified myself! As this realization continued to manifest within me, I received more clarity about how I should be living my life. I don't know the right words to use to describe the feeling I have from living my life on purpose now. The shadow of uncertainty is gone. I awake each morning eager to see what the horizon of creativity will reveal to me. **** What's your thing? What is your passion in life? Do you even have passion in your life? Are you living on purpose or is life dragging you through the trenches of indecisiveness, procrastination or, even worse, stagnation? **** Do you know that you possess gifts, talents and abilities that have been cleverly and carefully woven together to fit your unique personality? The world needs your special mix! Someone somewhere NEEDS YOU! YOU MATTER!!!! It's not too late to make yourself your priority. Step out of your own shadow and let yourself BE YOU!

It's been a practice of mine for some years now to begin each day - generally around 4 a.m. - journaling my prayer time. I call it my Days of Communion. I have my tea, multiple colored pens, my journal, and worship or meditation music. The colors of my pens represent different streams of conscious: purple is mine (it's my favorite color), red represents the Spirit (like how the words of Jesus are distinguished in the Bible), and black, blue, and green are for miscellaneous things like definitions of words that I don't know or quotes of people that are relevant that mornings topic. Today is my 605th Day of Communion. As I collected myself and quieted my mind, I was drawn to the amazing feeling swirling in my solar plexus. I can't help but smile as I recall it now. I can't find the words to describe it. It was a mixture of pride, satisfaction, awe and love. I whispered, "Wow, this feels so good!" The following is the discourse that followed - it's in red in my journal :) Indeed, it does feel good. It's suppose to because you are living authentically by taking the steps that fulfill your passion. So many people are listlessly bumbling along without passion and excitement in their lives because they do not know who they are. Identity begats assurance. Assurance begats decisiveness. Decisiveness begats progression. Progression begats attainment. Attainment begats a higher awareness. Heightened awareness begats a deeper understanding of self which leads to a more refined identity. And then the cycle repeats itself until the dawning of self-actualization which is actually an authentic, holistic lifestyle. People like the statement "no one is perfect". OH, I BEG TO DIFFER! Self-actualization by definition is the realization or fulfillment of one's talents and potentialities and it is a need present in everyone. It is the cause of desperate cry: "why am I here?" The inherent drive for the answer to this question is so powerful that it can change the course of humanity. Once an individual reaches their highest level of psychological development and is thriving authentically in the fullness of their potential, they have reached their own level of "perfection" (because "perfection" in this form is subjective). They have, in essence, debunked the now cliched "no one is perfect" ideology - which is actually a form of social conditioning!! Let's take it a step further. Be ye perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect. Matthew 5:48 This is the exhortation Jesus gave his disciples AFTER forty-seven verses of instructions on how to reach perfection within oneself and towards others. Earnestly following these instruction will lead to a higher state of consciousness which includes an in-depth awareness of who you are in the midst of others. It will also cultivate a heightened level of sociological empathy and compassion. This will consequently set in motion a quest for perfection among individuals thereby impacting the world at large. You see, the little steps you take in obedience to your own calling in life affects others in ways unbeknownst to you. Like the pebble dropped into a lake: the ripples of its' impact continue far and wide long after it has settled at the bottom... Stay the course. Though you may have to step out into darkness: take the step. Through the darkness is how you will find your light. Then you will see that your light is actually your self actualized.