This is my story as a 20 year old boy fighting depression and my choices. It all started when I was forced to migrate to Nellore from Chennai as my parents were in search of better educational standards in the school I study. But what they were really interested in, was to replace all of my extra-curricular activities with books, so I'd turn out to be a total geek and start the same old man-machine cycle. The cycle involves getting a high-paying job, serving as the ATM for a family for several decades, leading another descendant to starting this whole thing again and of course die a seemingly meaningful death. Ever since I reached Nellore, I felt my sub-conscious telling me all the time that it was not the right place for me. We landed in a creepy house, home to lizards, mosquitos, frogs, cockroaches, moths and what not. I got diarrhoea within a few days of staying but somehow my parents seemed to like the place. The school I got admitted into had a cemetery right behind it. All of these were definitely not good signs. I left the school within a year of joining after pleading my father. The next house we moved into was comparatively expensive but that's much better than a house of horrors, isn't it? I got admitted into a much smaller school but that's better than a big school with a bad omen, isn't it? Although I was satisfied that I could keep the past aside and move on, I always felt incomplete. Ever since I watched Dhoni hit the six and thus win the world cup for India, I kind of became a daydreamer. I either used to imagine myself hitting the six or taking the last wicket of my opponent team and winning the world cup in the end. I always used to request my father to help me join one of those cricketing academies. In reply to that, he would either hang up the phone or divert the topic. A few years passed and my high school was done. My parents immediately suggested on preparing for the JEE-Advanced test and joining a secondary school that'd coach me for that. I had to say yes and had to regret saying it for the following two years of my life. The secondary school had nearly 11 hours of classes a day and I used to feel hungry everyday on my way home. I performed extremely underrated and my parents used to yell at me at will, reminding me about the amount of money they paid so I could study and the problems they faced as kids. None of that got into my brain as it was already pre-occupied with un-fulfilled dreams. I didn't even come close to qualifying JEE-Advanced and that very thought made me feel worthless. In the end my mother developed anxiety issues whereas my dad developed short-temper issues, all of this as a price for migrating from Chennai to Nellore. I was heartbroken of the fact that while many other teens of my age were out there preparing for their U-19 trails and some of whom were playing the U-19 world cup and thus the IPL, I was aging really fast into probably a helpless old man. I joined a small under-ranked university and my parents were not too amused with that. Everyday they used to lecture me on how their relatives and my fellow-mates made it to prestigious institutes while I had to settle for something small. From that moment on, I got addicted to the pokemon anime which I was watching back then. After I saw the main protagonist Ash Ketchum loose one pokemon league after another, a spark got lit deep inside me. I wouldn't say it was much but It reminded me of myself and my failures. I felt like I was watching my story. So I kept watching of the hope that someday he'd win and that would change my fate as well. In the meantime I was able to convince my father into joining me in a cricket academy. Although I felt like things were slowly going in my way and I was going to do something extraordinary, I eventually realized that I was too late. My age criteria for the U-19 trails confirmed that. It tore me apart. In 2019, the spark that had lit itself in my mind years ago became much brighter as I watched my favorite protagonist Ash win his first championship after loosing six. A dream that lasted nearly 2 decades, reality! That gave me hope that maybe, success is nearing. This gave me a bit of confidence preparing for my do or die U-23 trails. But just as I was so anxiously waiting for my trails, the lockdown came as a party-pooper. Finally, I realized what my second chance was. I realized that my dream of playing for India was already done and had to be replaced by a new one. I decided that even if it means that I'm going to play for a different nation, I'll not give up on my dream. I planned and I executed. I got the highest package ever offered in my university but didn't settle for temporary satisfaction. I passed the IELTS test with flying colors, developed a really high profile on my CV, pleased my parents and am looking for my next country to land on.

“THE THINGS I LEARNED DURING QUARANTINE LIFE” When you think back to your first day in lockdown, what were your fears, worries, and hopes? Are you the same person now than you were at the beginning of all this? What has changed about who you are and how you view the world? Before the lockdown was implemented! I was living a ROBOTIC life like most of us; I knew I had to make CHANGES; I knew I had to inculcate certain habits to make those changes, I knew I had to START… but I just kept living almost as if somebody had put a socket and a battery in me and I switched it ON every morning, did the routine stuff, and then switched it OFF at night to go off to sleep. But, the lockdown changed things for ME, or maybe it was just ME, who pushed myself to changed and take change. This lockdown gave all us a great opportunity to grow, at least; I will always Thankful for this lockdown. This lockdown taught me some important lesson of life, which are as follow: The thing I learned is that, Everybody is a treasure in them. They do not need to keep finding that treasure in a loved one, job, money, fame. Don't get me wrong here. I don't mean that relationships are not important and that other humans who we bond with to form relationships should be discarded to discover yourself; or that all jobs are worthless. What I intend to says that Humans, we forget to validate ourselves, in a world when people feel validated only when OTHERS COMPLIMENTS THEM or OTHERS TELL THEM ABOUT THEIR STRENGTHS, They will very quickly feel invalidated when those some OTHERS WILL CALL THEM OUT ON THEIR WEAKNESS, BELITTLE THEM, CRITICIZE THEM, that is why it is important to find the treasure within YOU. I'm still in the process of doing that but it has been a wonderful and empowering Journey. One more thing that I learned is that whatever you wished for maybe some years ago. You can bring it to action today. We will witness so many writers, actors, singers, musicians, chefs, designers, programmers, painters, and the list is long, showcasing their talents. Also, large friction was of people who discovered their new talents. Many gained new skills through practice and hard work, talking about my self. I like to write because it allows me to focus on something and help me relieve stress. I enjoy writing because you can write anything based on how I feel at that moment SAD, HAPPY, ANALYTICAL; anything can become good writing, I like to write because it is a way for me to express my thoughts. During this lockdown I got time for myself to polish my writing skill, as I'm a stay at home parent .so, I couldn't be able to find time for me. So, I just wanted to use this lockdown period productivity, and want to do something different for my career. So I have completed online courses on a different topic, I have started my career as a creative writer. I have also started my blog, where I can post my thoughts and my experience. I would love to write about POSITIVITY, HEALTH, MOTIVATION, and RELATIONSHIP. I have also worked as a guest blogger for different platforms. I believe that bringing a child into the world and focusing on his or her needs through infancy is a worthwhile goal. But as your child gets older and begins preschool or kindergarten, you may find that you are interested in returning to a career or getting an education. So this lockdown is a golden opportunity for all of us especially for the stay at home parent to grow and develop your career. This is my suggestion that you could also write about your quarantine life and things you learned during this COVID-19 pandemic. Good luck.