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Your immediate reaction to the title is most likely one of the following: WHAT??? WHY??? How could you?? I could never… Or something along the lines of… Okay, cool 👍 Is that…a big deal? Literally no one cares. …What's Instagram again? If you are younger than 20, though, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that your response probably belongs to the first group. Pardon the generalization, but stereotypes do exist for some reason. Deleting one of my primary sources of social media was a decision that was one of many in my quest to maximize personal growth, success, and happiness… but it also stemmed from a lot of mysterious discontent in my life, of which the exact roots could not be traced. Of course, as an 18-year-old, I have always known that social media has a very strong presence in our lives. But truthfully, I never really thought deeply about the extent to which it had an influence over me and the role it played in my life, my growth, and my overall happiness. Until now. But what prompted this profound train of thought? The answer: a well timed-series of events. (Life has a funny way of making that happen.) A few weeks ago, one of my good friends deleted her Instagram. At the time, though I fully understood and agreed with her reasons, I didn't believe that I could do it myself — to just go and delete years of memories and connections that, though documented virtually, were still made in real life. The idea of all those memories and connections gone made my heart ache. After we talked about it, I didn't dwell on it too much, but not long after, upon my return to university, I unfortunately started to struggle with my overall happiness again. Something I had difficulty with in a totally new environment was finding people who I had a natural connection with: similar interests, values, lifestyles, etc. But this time, another layer of complexity was added. While the last time I had struggled with finding new kindred souls, now, I was having trouble staying on the same wavelength as some longtime friends. To be honest, in my desire to constantly learn and grow, I believe that a gap was widening at an exponential rate, and an obstruction had been reached in some of my relationships: I don't believe that you have to have everything in common with someone to be friends, but… the differences had started to outweigh the similarities. In attempt to solve my problems, I tried to pinpoint one identifiable thing that attributed to why I felt out of place sometimes with people around my age. TikTok. Okay, hear me out. I'm really not against people having a good time but TikTok has always seemed a tad frivolous to me. Yet, a crazy amount of people my age and younger are quite active on the app, and I started to wonder… why is it such an epidemic? And just how many people have been pulled into the greater vortex of online culture due to peer influences and desired connectivity? Moreover, I wondered if, despite my prideful resistance, a part of me was also feeling natural pressures to be like the “average” person my age… I have always been told that I am quite mature relative to my peers, but despite that, was I still being held down by age expectations? I mean, so many times, I have felt the subconscious urge to say something out of character in order to produce a laugh or be “relatable”. Though the Internet breeds insane creativity at times (Youtube and Instagram, especially!), it is also quite proficient in stunting individuality. I think most people can understand the feeling of doing something you don't really want to do, saying something you don't really believe in, or hanging out with people you don't really like. I've come to realize that this whole “trying to stick to the status quo” act is truly a waste of time, energy, and potential… not to mention a huge hindrance to our personal growth. Social media having the ability to direct my growth and my ideals more than I am actively aware of is something that I now want to inhibit, or at least be able to control completely. This is how everything that I have been feeling AND observing — isolation, loneliness, alienation, insecurity, insincerity, fear, uniformity — comes together. And ultimately, this is why I chose to delete my Instagram. I wanted to detach from something that I've been connected to for many, many years of my life during a critical period of growth. I realize that I need to grow by myself and become the person I want to be without an excess of influences pulling me in all sorts of directions that may not reflect what I truly want. Sometimes you need to distance yourself from what you know, from what is familiar, to figure out who you are. And who you aren't. I suppose I can understand now why people go on those mysterious silent retreats into the mountains… Anyway, I don't want to mould myself based off of other people anymore. From now on, I want to be my truest, individual self. My own self.

Over the past year, I have survived- fully functional- without the aid of the modern-day ‘iPhone'. I have made friends, engaged in healthy social interaction, and largely missed out on absolutely nothing in my life because of this quote-unquote detriment. I have still been able to participate in nearly every aspect of my life, from school to my social life in a fairly normal way. The only part that I have missed, in my opinion, is the normalcy of being a teenager in this fine, unholy mess of the present day. The world has evolved, as everyone who reads this is surely aware, in a way that has sewn phones into the fabric of our lives in a deep, irreparable way. We suffer without them- Or at least we think we do. From the moment we wake up to the moment we lay our heads on our pillows, they are in our hands and influencing us, movement-to-movement. They wake us up for work and school every morning and ceaselessly pester us throughout the day- “Wanna go out for lunch?” a message may read. “There's a party this weekend! You should come!” another may offer. ‘Three new likes on your post.' ‘Four new comments on your post.' When you see the situation laid out in front of you this way, it may seem like nothing more than an unhealthy obsession we humans have created for ourselves, and that it is- for some people. We cannot neglect the fact that, through technology, we have infinitely eased some of our daily life hassles. We have additionally greatly improved the safety of our world in many ways, too. Without phones, you would not be able to quickly message your parent and ask who's picking you up from school. You would not be able to quickly check your bank account so as not to spend more money than you have. You would not be able to shoot your boss a message, letting her know you're too sick to come in this morning. I've made my case in support of phones, but I have yet to acknowledge their dangers. Not having a phone, and therefore experiencing these minor inconveniences, was one-hundred-percent a result of my own choices. I had repeatedly made mistakes- And when I was given grace, I made the same mistakes again. I will not use a phone incorrectly moving forward. I couldn't, knowing the damage it can, and has, caused. I am not willing to ruin my own life- To burn before I've even gotten off the ground. I will not engage in online interaction with people I don't know. Stranger Danger is a phrase we have been teaching our children for years- But the only real danger is when that stranger is behind a screen. The term ‘stranger' even extends to include people you've met in real life before, but don't really know. I will not send messages or images that are in any way considered inappropriate or could be held against me in the event the person I once felt comfortable and trusting in decides to turn against me. I never felt like this was a real thing that could happen to me, but I am now very aware that it's not such an uncommon thing to experience. I will not send secretive and malicious messages that are worthy of hiding. The phone is meant for communication, sure, but only the positive and polite kind. I must be honest with what I say through the phone, and be careful of the way the things I say may come across. I will not interact with the dangerous- Frankly even deadly- world of social media. Snapchat, Instagram, and Facebook are a breeding ground for hate speech, cyberbullying, and life-ruining miscommunications. I am, quite possibly, the most aware of the dangers of technology due to the massive impacts it has had on my life. As a member of the first generation to be unable to remember a time without the internet, we have had these phones in our hands and in our lives since we were born. I personally have come to be alright without having a phone- Grateful, even- Until fairly recently. I desire the functional, organizational tool that is a cell phone. As someone who now has a job, a bank account, and very well may be using the, admittedly sketchy, Indianapolis public transit every day to get to and from school, having a phone displays obvious benefits. The only way I can properly use these aforementioned benefits is when I am very cautious not to abuse them. I would like to be able to reach my parents when I arrive at school in the morning. I would like to be able to get messages from my manager when she needs me to work extra days one week. I would like to be able to check my account balance before I buy those Chick-Fil-A fries at lunch and dip into the negative. I would like to be able to talk to and call Lindsey and Kaikeyi and the rest of them when I am not physically with them, especially Kristi who lives far away. I would like to take beautiful pictures of my art, makeup, and cosplays, and friends when people ask to see them. I would like to use a phone as a business tool to further the reach of my commissions. And finally, I would like your trust, even on days when it's hard. I would like nothing more.

A/N: 4 characters are Rose, Olivia, Rose's Autocorrect (RA), and Olivia's Autocorrect (OA). I wrote this scene for Emerson Festival for my school as the opening scene for our devised piece and it is my favorite thing I've ever written! Enjoy (: ---------------------------------------------------------------- (lights go up on Rose & Olivia) Rose & Olivia: (talking to themselves) Do I text her? Do I not text her? Do I wait for her to text me? Do I get ignored for a third day in a row? Do I suffer again? (beat) I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna text her. (Taking out their phones and “texting”) Hi! Rose: Wow, two minds think-- RA: Alight. Rose: Right? Olivia: … Alight? Rose: Damn autocorrect. I meant-- RA: Rewrite. Rose: DAMN IT! Not rewrite. ALIKE! ALIKE! Olivia: (uncomfortable) Right… anyways, you looked really-- OA: Bountiful. Olivia: Today, Rose. Rose: I looked bountiful? Olivia: SHIT. NO, no. Rose: Autocorrect? Olivia: Yeah, what I meant to say was that you looked-- OA: Bootylicious. Rose: OH? Olivia: BEAUTIFUL! Rose: What? Olivia: Nevermind. Rose: Alright… Uh, are you going to the football game tomorrow? Olivia: Nah. Those things give me-- OA: Acupuncture. Rose: Umm. Okay! Thats cool. Olivia: ANXIETY! ANXIETY! Rose: This conversation is giving me anxiety. OA: Smelly. Rose: OKAY LISTEN-- Olivia: IT'S MY AUTOCORRECT I SWEAR! SORRY. I AM SORRY. S-O-R-R-Y. GOD. JUST MY LUCK. Rose: Haha, it's-- RA: Fish. Olivia: (confused) Blub? Rose: Blub? I meant fine. Olivia: Fine… um-- I have something to ask you. Rose: Alright-- RA: Lay on me. Olivia: That's a first. Rose: LET'S NOT GO THERE. I WAS TRYING TO SAY LAY IT ON ME. LIKE TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT TO ASK. Olivia: Do you wanna-- OA: Go drought with me? Rose: There's a drought? Where? Olivia: OUT! GO OUT! Rose: Outside? Olivia: No! Rose: I'm confused. Olivia, what are you trying to say? Olivia: ROSE WILL YOU PLEASE-- OA: HATE ME! Rose: I don't want to hate you. I really-- RA: Dislike you. Olivia: What? Rose: WHAT? Olivia: So that's how you feel about me? Rose: NO! AUTOCORRECT! I LIKE YOU, Olivia! I DON'T WANT TO-- RA: Date you. Olivia: I AM SO CONFUSED. Rose: HATE. I don't want to hate you. Olivia: Okay. Mine was autocorrected too. I definitely don't want you to hate me. I meant to ask if you would like to-- OA: Debate me. Rose: In what? Olivia: DATE. DATE ME. Rose: So you want me to debate whether I should date you or not? Olivia: Wow. That autocorrect actually worked out. Will you? RA: Guess. Olivia: No? Rose: YES. Yes. I want to date you. Olivia: Nice. Rose: Nice. Olivia: Cool. Rose: Cool. Olivia: Thank you for saying yes. (END)