Last night, I felt impressed to write a letter to the President of the United States of America to share with him three points I needed to get off of my chest. The first point was to thank him and his family for putting our country first. Regardless of political beliefs, President Trump has convinced me that he and his family really do want America to be the greatest country in the world, which is something I can support. The second point was to ask why are there reports stating dead people received COVID-19 stimulus money? How come there is not some sort of regulation in place with the government that cross references social security numbers of those just written on a death certificate to the government agencies that send money? Obviously grieving families do not always tell the IRS or Social Security Administration that their loved one just died. And, let's face it, there are a lot of crooks in the world who do not want these agencies to know a person is dead. The third point I felt like I needed to share with the President of the United States was to ask for his prayers. He and his family appear to be the kind of people who pray to the Christian God, and since that is the same type of faith that I share, I hope he will take the time and utter a quick prayer asking for God's favor to finally shine on my life, so that I, too, will recover from this pandemic. I honestly do not know what else I am going to do if I do not find a job. I know people think that "white privilege" is a real thing. And maybe it is for some, but not for me. Reputable jobs want to check credit. Okay, fine. Just only use my recent North Carolina credit history and ignore everything in Georgia. I barely escaped my home state with my life and the clothes on my back. My former husband knows my social security number and when I left, he made sure to ruin my credit in hopes of forcing me to stay with him. When that did not work and I left anyway, he tried killing me by making it look like an accident (See photo. That story will be told at a later time). If I do not get a job, I do not know what I am going to do. I have worked everyday since I was fifteen years old. I do not know anything but working. I have never even filed for unemployment before now. All of my life, the people in it have told me that I would never amount to anything and would accomplish nothing...I do not want to think that they are right. That the decisions I have made in my short forty-four years on this planet were all for naught, especially on that first day when I wake up with zero dollars in my bank account, has made them be able to say, "I told you so". With a future so uncertain, where does one go from here? How does one recover? Hopefully, I will get a job before I need the unemployment benefits. If I cannot finally establish a career because I am discriminated against due to my lack of color, disability, or credit report, then, my back-up plan is that maybe I will receive unemployment benefits which will help supplement my income until I begin the local community college in August and find a part time job on campus. Even though I have over twenty years of experience in the office administrative and legal assistance industry, apparently employers are looking for education as well, which is why I will be getting my degree in Paralegal Technology so that I can pass the State and Federal exams. In the meantime, I plan on writing to help pass my time and keep my mind occupied. And maybe, just maybe, something else will come out of this experience and I will wake up one morning in the near future to realize that I am finally living my America Dream.

Between war, negative life circumstances, depression and my dreams which one will win? You will be an important person, an American soldier told me. Alone in the jungle, I am freezing, I am hungry, I am afraid. There is a lot of blood. Let me hide. There are dead bodies. What's going on? I do not know where I am. I am lost, I am afraid of Dracula. The Bush is moving, it might be a lion, not maybe a tiger or cheetah. Oh my God, I am too young to die. Anyway, I am not ready to die. Come on, dying at this age. I just totalized 11 years old one week ago. “I am screaming mom, dad, where are you? Like ten times”. My parents are not responding. I am hearing some noise, it is a roar. How did I get in a jungle? All these thoughts in my head, let me take a nap and maybe tomorrow will be a better day. I remembered Mama once said to me “jo never ever forget to pray before sleeping" in my prayer I thought God to bring back my parents and help me remember what happened? I found a tree where there was a little bit moon shadow far away from those dead bodies. I decided to force myself to sleep despite it was cold. In my dream, my mom and dad calling my name I am alone in the jungle. It was all dark. ''They found me and mom asked me why am I alone and crying?" "I told them I am lost, and I was looking for you". "'My dad told me don't cry any more, my son". "You are the son of a leader who will be a leader". "He said son remembered you have my blood." "I gave you everything u need". "Life is going to be difficult but if you are keeping working hard and praying". "One day you will be successful and make us proud". "Life took us away from you, but we are watching over you and just know we love you". After that, I saw a person with a bright shadow appearing and tell them the time is up. My mom and dad hugged me for the last time, and they disappeared. Directly I woke up in the jungle early in the morning, I thought about my dream, but I realised what happened yesterday was a bad dream. instead, it is a reality; I am a child turned a man. So, I decided to find a way out or find where people are. I started walking, walking without resting and I didn't eat. I kept walking until I saw a river. I was thirsty so I decided to drink water from the river, and it tastes like salt, but I had no choice. Then I had a pen and a small paper in my pocket, but I don't know where it was from. the pen I had in my pocket just felt down in the river. It started flowing and I decided to follow the pen as I followed the pen, I saw a girl running so I decided to follow her. By following her, I saw there was a kind of armed soldiers I never saw before after her, so I decided to run smartly behind them to discover what is going on? Then I saw one of the soldiers getting out of the car and took her by force, so I was behind the remaining soldiers. I saw the soldier who was before her, trying to take off her clothes so she is shouting leave me alone and I thought they want to rape her.