B00ksareapartoflife

A Frightening Childhood Experience: All that I've been tasting

Feb 26, 2018 6 years ago

The mini bus came to a halt. This should have been a relief after five whole minutes of it jerking backwards and forwards beyond the driver's control. Yet the ever so present darkness lingering outside intertwined with the sudden moment of silence did not make it any better. This very factor completely debunked the idea of walking home no matter how close it now was. The two men got out of the vehicle with the driver sliding underneath it as the conductor directed the torch for him. That's when the song began to play; as I sat isolated, the only remaining soul in the bus. I was five years old when I began to hate the song, twelve years later and I still do. Did I mention it was raining quite heavily that evening (the five PM light made non-existent due to it being winter)? It was really the perfect desolate scene for that song and although it could have only been between three and five minutes it felt much longer because up to now I cannot remember any other song that played before nor after that one. The radio must have been jammed, that's the only explanation, jammed by the universe. The song blaring through the speakers was ‘lonely' by Akon. I'm sure back then my fiver year old intuition noticed that something about that entire scenario did not make sense although I have only begun to really think about it recently. Why would that song heighten my fear in that moment so drastically it caused my hatred of it. Was I really afraid of being left alone in a bus on a dark and rainy day with two possible monsters outside, or was there more? That ride back home from school was not the main issue. My being alone in that bus as the song played was part of it. I was afraid indeed, afraid of being eternally lonely. Somehow my fear became a more evident reality as I grew up. From being an outcast to being included yet still feeling alone a line from one of my favourite musician's songs comes forcefully to mind, ‘If lonely is a taste then it's all that I've been tasting.'~ NF real music

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